Spirits full

Giving children the freedom to determine the skills possessed

First, some context: it helps to have an education. He once said D.H. Lawrence, “The ideas of one generation become the instincts of the next.” As a native Japanese, my wife comes from a long academic history, two of his uncles were teachers, and another one at Waseda University in Tokyo, and his father was a Buddhist priest. Moreover, as a culture, the Japanese are famous for showing respect to their “sensei” or teacher.

My history is more gritty and mundane. Ancestors come from Chicago, Ireland, workers who put more emphasis on practice in academic activities. However, my mother taught me to read when I was four years and gave me love of books featured month through my formative years. As a result, the university could simultaneously read James Joyce and Samuel Beckett.

Strangely, these large differences in background and place of origin may have helped develop our skills as parents. When two parties are as far apart culturally and my wife and I may learn to appreciate diversity and accommodate the views of others. This attitude-free and our shared appreciation for literature, had much to do with the way we educate our children. They always seemed to have a book in his hands. Not that they are so we asked, just happened to be natural.

In fact, at home, we asked for very little. Unlike many parents who feel compelled to set rules and standards for their work, monitor their activities, establish curfews and dictate behavior, we did not do anything. We never saw ourselves as tyrants. Much less as policemen. Our policies were simply concerned to discover what our daughters were then interested in the same. For example, when our oldest daughter was three, began to rely on the coffee table, with one foot raised in the air, saying, “Daddy, look, ballet ‘. This continued for several weeks. Finally, my wife and I realized that this was something serious for girls and we list in dance classes, where they prospered, next to his second sister, who also showed a similar interest.

When I realized that this was an activity that my two daughters were interested in and that could last a dozen years, I looked at my wife and said, “Hey baby, not the football players here, just dancers. There that undesirables “. Then my wife got an excellent jazz dancer and I learned to do my thing in hip hop. Stories abound of parents who force their children to take classes unwanted violin or piano. Sorry, but I think that’s putting the cart before the horse to have. Let the kids determine their activity, whether artistic or athletic, and if possible, unite!

I am not suggesting that parents physically participate in all activities of their children. When our third child, for example, decided that sport was persuaded to do more tricks, he could freely avoid dance and take the race track. At that point in our lives, my wife and I were not ready to attempt the high fences. But it was enough to perform at their skills and show our support whenever possible.

And support is actually the name of the game. I think parents autocratic and arrogant, they lose the target. Children are free spirits full of spontaneity and enthusiasm, these are qualities that can not be forced and must be nurtured. Both my wife and I believe that children should be left to their own resources to determine the purpose of his soul. It is not good-looking and creates ill will, than a parent force a child to go in a direction contrary to the purest impulses of the child, whether those impulses lead you to the dance, sports, art or music.